Thursday, January 15, 2009

My Celebrity Diary

When I tell people that I work in Hollywood the first thing they say to me is “excuse me,” and then they get off the elevator whether it’s their floor or not. But whenever I’m out of town and people ask where I live, my answer is always followed by the same question, “Do you ever see any celebrities?”

I always have to laugh a little bit. You see, people who don’t live in Los Angeles don’t understand that in Hollywood the random celebrity encounter is just another part of life. It’s no different than bumping into your mailman at the local Wal-Mart. But just for fun, I began keeping a small journal of my random encounters with Hollywood’s rich and fabulous, and I would like to share some of that journal with my readers. Enjoy:

Wednesday, November 26th-- 5 PM: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. Poquito Mas on Sunset. Eating a Burrito on the patio. He doesn’t have the trademark mustache anymore. Looked better with it.

Tuesday, December 2nd-- 6 PM: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. Poquito Mas on Sunset. Weird Al again. I make eye contact and smile. I wonder if he eats here everyday.

Wednesday, December 3rd-- 6:47 PM: Spotted, what’s-her-name from Wanted. Poquito Mas on Sunset. She’s disguised in a cap and sunglasses. Still no sign of Weird Al Yankovic. I’ll wait awhile longer.

Thursday, December 4th-- 8:45 PM: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. Driving quickly past Poquito Mas on Sunset. Tried to get in my car and follow, but lost him. Next time will wait in the car.

Friday, December 5th-- 6 PM to 12 AM: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. Poquito Mas on Sunset, Ralph’s Grocery store on Sunset, 20/20 video on Santa Monica, City Express Cleaners on Santa Monica, and finally entering a private residence on Mountcrest Avenue, WeHo. Keep running into the guy!

Saturday, December 6th-- 3 AM to Present: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. In a private residence on Mountcrest Avenue in West Hollywood. It appears that Weird Al lives near a tree I am currently occupying. If I get a chance to get near him I may make a joke like, “What are you stalking me or something?” Just to break the ice. I wonder if he would recognize me. Maybe I’ll wear a disguise like a ski mask or something for fun.

Sunday, December 7th-- 5:45 PM: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. Private residence on Mountcrest Avenue in West Hollywood. Decided to go over and finally introduce myself to neighbor Weird Al Yankovic. After minutes and minutes of buzzing his gate, he answered. He didn’t seem too happy even though I brought him his favorite, the Shrimp Burrito San Filipe with no Mojado sauce. Maybe it was a bad time. Maybe he just doesn’t appreciate the little people. Maybe he needs to learn a lesson.

Monday, January 12th-- 3:30 PM: Spotted, Weird Al Yankovic. Los Angeles County court room, downtown Los Angeles. Apparently some random run-ins with Weird Al have lead to a big misunderstanding and some sort of restraining order. That’s okay. I’ll clear this up. I’ll make sure that Weird Al understands everything that I see. He'll understand one day. I'll make sure of it.


Anonymous said...

In the 15 years I lived in LA --

I saw Marcia Clark once at a Ralph's.

I saw "Cockaroach" from the Cosby Show once at El Torito, my mom thought I was whispering that we should leave the restaurant.

And on a date with my husband at Intermezzo, he tried to convince me that Drew Barrymore was flirting with him.

Anonymous said...

Stay Wacky Nate.

- Weird Al.

squire said...

The other day I heard something on the radio about some creepy old guy stalking Jennifer Love Hewitt, and I didn't know what was worse - that he could be her grandfather, or that he has absolutely no taste.

Now I realize that man will be you in 20 years :)

To your credit though, at least Weird Al doesn't think his work should be taken seriously...

Anonymous said...

Years ago, I remember seeing Weird Al at Poquito Mas eating a burrito by himself. I told you about it over the LA Bite radio and you raced through traffic to get there. By the time you arrived, he was gone. I pray this wasn't the seed that rooted your stalking plant. If so, I am truly sorry.

Kate said...

I'm sorry... did Weird Al comment on your blog?

By the way... you still owe me that court fine you borrowed

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